SKINNY JEANS

I just found out that the skinny part is the ankle, so you can wear skinny jeans even if you have a fat ass.
THE SKINNY JEANS DIET:
breakfast: espresso with hot milk, 2 pieces of toast w butter. no jam
lunch: salad of romaine lettuce, dressed with olive oil and salt. lime juice optional
dinner: fresh vegetable, roasted or pan blackened. potato (sweet potato, idaho, or baby, roasted whole or slivered. 4 oz of pasta, meat, or fish of your choice. club soda and red wine. mixed, or not
late snack: Ben & Jerry's Dublin Mudslide ice cream, nuked in micro 11 seconds, with cold 1% milk poured on.
bedtime: chamomile tea or fresh ginger tea

THE SKINNY JEANS WORKOUT:
2 full push-ups, every day
2x 30 minutes jogging, 2x week
walk every day